TALES OF THE CRYPTIDS by Kelly Milner Halls, Rick Spears, and Roxyanne Young, Darby Creek Publishing, September 1, 2006 - Available for pre-order at Amazon.com, or order direct from Darby Creek by July 15 and get the book for 50% off! You can be one of the very first to own one of the hottest non-fiction titles for kids coming out this Fall! See the coupon link below. Editor's Note: Yes, I could show you the fake mermaid image, but I'm not. Kelly Milner Halls and a furry fan. Photo by Vanessa Halls.

A MERMAID’S TALE: A TRUE STORY
By Kelly Milner Halls

As I was preparing for an elementary school visit earlier this year, the librarian thumbed through the pages of my new book, TALES OF THE CRYPTIDS (Darby Creek Publishing, Fall 2006).  It was a roughly bound copy of the final printer's galley I brought to show the kids, just for fun -- errors and all. 

To my surprise, she closed the book about halfway through and said, "Well, I can't carry THIS book, I can tell you that."  Bam.  Curtain down. 

“O-o-o-o-okay,” I said.  “Can I ask why?”

“There’s a huge picture of a male genital in it,” she said.  “I can’t shelve a book with a picture like that.”

I nearly externally snorted my diet soda.

"There is a what?” I said.  “No, no, no, no...you're wrong. You have to be wrong.”

“No,”  she insisted. "I saw it plainly...a rather prominent one, I might add." 

I was stunned beyond words, with only ten minutes until the 6th graders filtered in -- 300 of them.  I wondered how in the heck a "thingee" made it into my cryptids book, if she was right.  I wondered how I MISSED it, if she was right.  I finally gathered my wits.

“Where is it?” I said.  “Show me.”

Reasonable, right?

She thumbed to the page where I interviewed a taxidermist about making modern day Feejee Mermaids out of donated animal parts, and pointed to the photo of a reproduction.

Quick.  Where ARE a mermaid’s genitals?

I looked down to where she was pointing, braced for the worst, and saw it – a fish tale; half a monkey, half a fish.

“Uhhh…that’s a fish tail,” I said.  “It’s an interview about constructing a fake mermaid."

“No,” she said.  “That’s a male genital.”

I looked again, wondering about her husband.  “It’s a fish tail,” I said pointing.  “Read it.”

She perused the text and agreed she’d misidentified the anatomy, but remained convinced it LOOKED like what she thought she saw. 

Later in the day, she grabbed her assistant and turned to the photo.  “What does that look like," she said. 

To my great relief, it took the assistant no time to respond.  "A fish tail," she said.  "Why?"  

“Never mind,” said the confused librarian.  "I guess I will be ordering the book after all."  

We had a good laugh about it, but there is a moral to this story.  When it comes to censorship, people will often see what they want to see, even if it’s not there.  But now and then, through gentle persuasion, they might also see the light. 

Either way, a writer's gotta do what a writer's gotta do.

Kelly Milner Halls is co-author of TALES OF THE CRYPTIDS: MYSTERIOUS CREATURES THAT MAY OR MAY NOT EXIST, with Rick Spears, who also illustrated the book, and Roxyanne Young. Check out the coupon below to pre-order CRYPTIDS for yourself or your local library at 50% off. Hurry, though. This special summer discount expires July 15. Click here to print a full-size image of the coupon.